Being in the people business, I hear my fair share of complaining/criticism. It comes with the job! Observing something that is wrong and wanting to make it right or better is not wrong. Many times the problem lies in how we go about trying to fix what we believe is wrong. Because the nature of sin has seeped into every part of our heart and mind, we must be cautious about how we communicate what we believe to be wrong. We must be very careful to act in wisdom to make things better rather than worse. Here are five things to think about before you criticize or complain.

 1. Do you have all the information, and do you know the why a decision was made? So many times, our complaints/criticism could be avoided if we knew why something was planned, done, said, etc. It is natural to jump to conclusions; however, it is the skill of wisdom to think and gather information before we form our opinions.

 2. Is your complaint/criticism a matter of opinion and preference or a clear matter of right and wrong? Understanding this difference is vital! I have experienced too many times someone ignore blatant sin only to criticize/complain with passion and fervor about a preference.

 3. Have you thought out exactly what you want to say? State your complaint/criticism clearly. A clearly stated complaint/criticism comes from time spent thinking about exactly what you want to say. Sometimes it is helpful to think about how to say the same thing three different ways to ensure proper understanding and good communication.

 4. Have you thought of a solution? Bring viable and reasonable solutions with your complaint. Thinking through the solution may help you empathize with others involved and understand the problem more clearly. The goal is to be part of the solution, not part of the problem.

 5. Are you known only as a complainer/criticizer? You may have 100 legitimate complaints/criticisms but if they are not balanced with positive comments and praises you will be tuned out. This is reality. People that you should desire to be around, will not want to be around you. Healthy, successful, and mature people will view you as a millstone tied to their neck dragging them to the bottom of the lake!